Iron Man 3 Movie Poster.

Iron Man 3 has a ’60s pulp spy novel vibe wed to irreverent black humor, giving it a different flavor than its predecessors. But it works. Oh, does it work.

In the wake of his near-death experience in The Avengers, Tony Stark aka Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.) is obsessively struggling with PTSD and a loss of confidence, and his relationship with Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow) is a rock he clings to. Of course, the Mandarin (Ben Kingsley) and Aldrich Killian (Guy Pearce) have plans that will put Stark, his world, and his relationship in extreme danger.

Director Shane Black (Kiss Kiss Bang Bang) successfully replaces Jon Favreau in the director’s chair. Despite only one film as a director to his credit, and a modestly budgeted one without significant visual effects at that, Black seems completely in his element with a mega-budget blockbuster loaded with visual effects galore. What he brings beyond that are ultra-cool pulp stylings and a knack for black humor, an approach that keeps the franchise’s third entry fresh. Where many superhero franchises stumble with film number three, this one may have actually just hit a new high, and, yes, I’m aware that’s a bold statement.

The screenplay by Black (who began his Hollywood career in the 1980s by writing Lethal Weapon) and Drew Pearce (creator of the British superhero sitcom No Heroics) delivers the expected superheroics with an unexpected dose of irreverent, even subversive, black humor. It takes the genre requirements seriously enough (though it may be as its weakest, relatively speaking, when it does), but it’s frequently funny and has a tone that perfectly manifests through the character of Stark. The writing is really an extension of the Stark persona, punctuated in the film by Stark’s narration.

Perhaps the most subversive thing Black and Pearce pull off is their brilliantly funny twist with the Mandarin. I won’t spoil the twist, but I applaud it, especially since they had to know the fanboy/girl literalists would howl in dismay. Let ‘em howl. The twist works.

While there’s much action involving the Iron Man armors (yes, in the plural), some of the most entertaining action scenes are just Tony Stark sans armor or sans much of it. This could easily be a pulp spy novel called Tony Stark: Man of Action, or a Marvel Cinematic Universe take on James Bond (the final end credit even riffs on 007 with “Tony Stark will return”). Or, hell, even MacGyver, since Stark has to whip up some improvised weaponry in the field (which is pretty much what happened with his original armor in the first film).

I would have liked a little more time spent delving into Stark’s PTSD, but that’s a minor quibble and doesn’t reflect on the overall quality of the writing.

Cinematographer John Toll (Braveheart, Cloud Atlas), production designer Bill Brzeski (Catwoman, The Hangover), and costume designer Louise Frogley (Constantine, Quantum of Solace) are responsible for realizing the pulp spy novel vibe visually while keeping it consistent with the look of the Marvel Cinematic Universe as a whole, and they consistently succeed. The score by Bryan Tyler (Constantine, The Expendables) is a muscular beast that fits the story. It took seventeen companies, and more money than most of us can probably imagine, to create the visual effects. Mission accomplished. They’re seamless and dazzling, and it’s nice to see a film where the effects serve to complement a good story rather than to replace one.

What to say about Robert Downey Jr. He fills the shoes (and armor) of Tony Stark as effortlessly as Sean Connery filled Bond’s shoes. His contract is up, but one hopes Disney opens their treasury for him for at least The Avengers 2 if not Iron Man 4, too. Downey always strikes the right balance between self-centered egotist and hero, and charms the audience even when his character is being a jerk. In this film, he gets to show another side of Stark, one traumatized by events in The Avengers. The Dark Knight Rises showed the physical toll being a superhero takes, but Iron Man 3 shows the emotional toll it can take.

Ben Kingsley. What he lacks in screen time, he more than makes up for with a scintillating Janus-headed performance. First he’s absolutely chilling (rivalling Heath Ledger’s Joker even), then later he’s amazingly funny, coming close to stealing the film from Downey. When they share scenes, it’s electric. I’d buy a ticket just to see their characters sitting or standing around for two hours. I really would. My Dinner with Tony and the Mandarin. Or even Waiting for Godot with Tony and the Mandarin. Yes.

Gwyneth Paltrow has always been an ideal Pepper. She can play Stark’s romantic interest while also impressing upon us that she’s a brilliant woman who’s the one who really keeps Stark’s life and business empire on track. This time, she also gets in on some of the action, subverting the damsel in distress trope just a bit.

Don Cheadle’s second go-around as Stark’s military buddy Rhodey, who became War Machine in Iron Man 2 and is re-branded as Iron Patriot here, works especially well with the story’s tone. There’s a certain buddy cop genre ambiance to his relationship with Stark, and Cheadle plays that quite well.

At first glance, Guy Pearce’s performance as Aldrich Killian seems to fade into the background, but that works for the character, and like Kingsley, he gets to play his character two very different ways.

The all-around solid cast also includes Rebecca Hall as Dr. Maya Hansen, a scientist whose work is key to the story; James Badge Dale as Eric Savin, the Mandarin’s main muscle; Stephanie Szostak as another Mandarin operative, Ellen Brandt; Jon Favreau as Stark’s former bodyguard, Happy Hogan (a role he played in the previous films, which he also directed); Ty Simpkins as a kid who befriends Stark (he has good chemistry with Downey in their scenes); Paul Bettany reprising his voice role as Stark’s AI, JARVIS (who gets several fun scenes of his own this time); and William Sadler and Miguel Ferrer as the US President and Vice-President respectively. Iron Man co-creator Stan Lee has a blink and you’ll miss it cameo as a beauty pageant judge.

Mark Ruffalo reprises his Avengers role as Dr. Bruce Banner in the humorous post-end credits scene, continuing the friendship that developed between Stark and Banner in that film.

Iron Man 3 is made of win. Go for the action, stay for the irreverent black humor, pulp stylings, Robert Downey Jr., Ben Kingsley, and a subversive twist. Marvel, if there’s an Iron Man 4, please do everything you can to bring back Messrs. Downey and Black.

[4.5 out of 5 stars]

I don’t know about you, but I feel fucking empowered right about now.

So, in post 253, I linked to the ShortPacked comic, where the female artist character demonstrates what Batman would look like if he were a female sexual fantasy instead of a male power fantasy.  The reason that comic is so important, and so often cited, is that when we start talking about the sexualization of female characters and how limited they are in comics, one of the first cries, right after “You’re just a jealous fat bitch!” is “Male characters are unrealistic, too!”

Well, yes, they are.  However, the unrealism of those male characters is not the fault of women.  We are, by and large, not the ones who invented them and who keep drawing them like steroid monkeys.  Those male characters are male power fantasies, not female sexual fantasies.   What does this mean?  Well, go look at that Shortpacked comic, and take in what the female character says about what Batman would look like if his main purpose was to appeal, sexually, to women.  Now, compare that to how the majority of male comic characters look.  How many of them meet the “female sexual fantasy” criteria?  Not a whole hell of a lot.  The ones who come close, like Nightcrawler or some renderings of Gambit, tend to have rabid female fanbases, in case you hadn’t noticed.

I mean, I dig on the Punisher, as a character, but not like I do Nightcrawler or Gambit.  And yeah, some girls are going to go for the ‘Roid monkey look.  It does happen, but by and large, we really don’t go for it, and if you ask women, “Huge, unrealistic muscles” is generally going to crop up fairly low on their list of desireable attributes in someone they want to date, or even just bang, if at all.

So, you can’t point to the way that male heroes are depicted and say that is exactly the same as how female characters are depicted.  And I’ll run down that list of why for you again.  A. Women aren’t the ones (for the most part), inventing or drawing these characters.  B.  Male characters, even in the realm of being male power fantasies, STILL have a far wider variety in body types and shapes than female characters get.  C.  Male characters are almost always more clothed and have armor that looks like armor and not just very uncomfortable lingerie.

Until fairly recently, I don’t think anyone could name more than one female comic writer or artist.  I know as far as the Big Two, I stall out at Gail Simone. And I actively look for female creators to support.  Indie comics do have a far larger female presence.  So women are not responsible for how most of our big name superheroes look.  That is all on the dudes.  Superman, Batman, the X-men (most team incarnations), that was all dudes.  Dudes drawing and writing for dudes.

Damn, you could crush a girl’s pelvis with those thighs.

Male characters have a wide variety of body types.  I can, off the top of my head, come up with multiple male characters that have different body types.  You have the Wolverine, short and stocky.  The Nightcrawler, short(-ish) and more slender, but still pretty muscly.  Colossus, Sabretooth, or Superman, big and really muscly.  Cyclops, average dude height and really well-muscled, if not as hugely muscled as the Colossus mod.  Doug Ramsey, skinny nerd (Woo! One non-muscly male character!).  But when you look at women, as I’ve said before, you’ve got tall and willowy with big tits, or short, lithe Asian woman or teenaged girl.  Or Aunt Mae.

That’s it.  For a few issues of the New Mutants during the Asgardian Wars, Karma is “cursed” with being monstrously fat.*  But then she gets skinny again, and we’re back to slender, lithe Asian girl.

I like my men bendy and lithe…

And finally, for the most part, the dudes get to keep their clothes on.  And if you’re going to start shrieking Namor at me, just realize that you look like a big giant tool when you do that, because for every Namor, there are a dozen Starfires, Storms (her early costume), White Queens, Psylockes, Electras,  Wonder Women, etc…

So, that, my friends, is false fucking equivalence.  Male and female characters look that way based on male fantasies, not female

If you like the blog or the podcast, please, please, please donate to keep us going.  Donations go to pay for the podcast hosting and website domain, primarily.

Oh, and Honey Badger’s first two songs are available for download here, for free or pay what you want.  We’re also part of a larger compilation to benefit a local venue, with a song written by yours truly.  Check it out (we’re track 16).

Remember we’ve got the GGR Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook page.

*Believe me, this is a whole other rant for another time, especially when she says she’d rather die than stay fat.  Holy fucking shit, beauty myth baggage much?

LOVE THIS SERIES!!!!!!!

Ok, so I bought this book the day after it came out, and then did not have time to read it until last week.   Wherein, I devoured it in two days of bus commute, finishing it up over dinner while ignoring my husband and room-mates.

I’m sure most of you already know what I’m going to say, and the shorter version of this review is:  ”Squee!!! Seanan McGuire! OMG!”

So, if all you’re looking for is:  Is it a Seanan McGuire novel, and up to her usual standards?  Yes.  Yes, it is.  So, you’re done.  Now, if you want some more info on why, then keep reading.  If not, then go buy it.  Now.

Synopsis:  The Covenant of St. George is coming to New York to check up on Dominic and to gauge whether or not it needs to be purged of Cryptids. Dominic is torn between his loyalties to the Covenant and his love of Verity.   And Verity worries about whether he’ll betray her and the entire Cryptic population of New York.

Telling you any more would be potentially spoilery, and I try to avoid that.  It wouldn’t stop me from reading, or enjoying it, but I know some people really hate that.  So I’ll stop.

Yet again, the rich background on the various Cryptid species is almost better than the love story between Verity and Dominic.  You learn a little more about Tanuki, Waheela (I freaking love Istas!), the Aislin Mice, Dragons, all of the Cryptid species have wonderful backgrounds, based on folklore and fleshed out by Seanan’s fantastic imagination.

I honestly don’t know what to tell you guys about this book that I haven’t said about the others.  She is a master of exposition, feeding you what you need to know without info-dumping you.  Her dialogue is natural with good flow, and her pacing is incredible.  As always.  And while the gut-punch didn’t hit me as hard in this book as it usually does, that may have more to do with what’s going on in MY life now, than anything to do with whether or not it really was as gut-punchy as usual.  You really do feel Verity’s angst and uncertainty about whether or not to trust Dominic and his defection.  Dominic’s pain is very, very real, and apparent.  And the Covenant is a pretty amazingly bad, bad guy.  They definitely fall under the “Every villain thinks he’s a hero” heading, having become so amazingly rigid in their thinking about Cryptids and their place in the world that they CANNOT adapt.  They are also a fantastic, if fictional, example of why religious fundamentalists freak me out so badly.

So, yes.  Go get this book.  Especially if you read the first one, but having read the first one is not necessary to understanding this one.  As I said, Seanan is fantastic at giving you enough background and exposition that you don’t need to do additional research, or need to have read the previous books to appreciate whichever number you do happen to pick up.

If you like the blog or the podcast, please, please, please donate to keep us going.  Donations go to pay for the podcast hosting and website domain, primarily.

Oh, and Honey Badger’s first two songs are available for download here, for free or pay what you want.  We’re also part of a larger compilation to benefit a local venue, with a song written by yours truly.  Check it out (we’re track 16).

Remember we’ve got the GGR Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook page.

Seriously?

One article, outlining why those excuses people use for why videogames are and should remain sexist are bullshit, resulted in me having to tell several dudes they could no longer hang out on my page because:

A.  The First Amendment does not say what you think it says.  Yes, the First Amendment grants the freedom of speech.  What that means is you get to say what you want, but that other people get to criticize what you say.  And it means you get to criticize what other people say.  And so on… Shorter: It does not protect you from being called an asshole.

B.  This blog/Facebook page is not the US government.  I cannot censor you.  I’m not a government agency.  Now I CAN delete your ass,  or block your ass, because this website, that facebook page, that twitter account, are MINE.  But I’m still not “censoring” you.  You can go scream about what a bitch I am from the mountain tops if you are so motivated, but you will not do it on my dime.

C.  The other people talking about misogyny in games are ALSO not the US Government, and therefore are not censoring you.  They get to talk about why sexual discrimination and misogyny in games are bad things.  And you get to voice your opinions.  And then we get to explain why we think you’re full of shit.  It happens.  Hopefully everyone can be grown ups about it and speak civilly.  But sometimes that doesn’t happen.

D.  If you’re upset that fewer misogynistic games and stuff are being made (and I don’t know that anyone CAN make the argument right now), that would be because people aren’t buying them.  If your blow up dolls are being replaced with realistic female characters, and that upsets you, well, then, you can just do what you’ve been telling female gamers to do for years and suck it up, Buttercup.

Even the creepy alien chicks can’t catch a break.  I left this full size so you could look at the way the costume is ripped away from her breasts.

Now  a question that came up, particularly in light of the Mortal Kombat game the article brought up, was do male characters lose their clothes like the female characters do as they’re wounded?  So I just spent fifteen minutes watching character bios for the Mortal Kombat, and while, yes, the male characters do lose parts of their clothing, they neither lose as much, nor in as sexualised a manner.  When the female characters lose their clothing, their already skimpy outfits lose the majority of their boob coverage and big chunks of what covers their asses.  When the guys lose parts of their clothing, the holes stay far, far away from their groins and asses.

Maholo Videogames on Youtube have the character bio walkthroughs for all the characters, so you can check this out for yourself.

Now I hope that by this point in the conversation, I hope I don’t have to go into detail about how male video game characters, which are exaggerated and idealized, are idealized MALE power fantasies (because I can’t get Shortpacked to cooperate with my machine, have the Mary Sue article).

So, in sum, while it may upset you that women (and some dudes) are pointing out that misogyny in your favorite media is a real thing, screaming “Censorship!” and “First Amendment!” aren’t going to do anything other than make you look stupid, and get you blocked.

If you like the blog or the podcast, please, please, please donate to keep us going.  Donations go to pay for the podcast hosting and website domain, primarily.

Oh, and Honey Badger’s first two songs are available for download here, for free or pay what you want.  We’re also part of a larger compilation to benefit a local venue, with a song written by yours truly.  Check it out (we’re track 16).

Remember we’ve got the GGR Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook page.

Fame and Misfortune by Kel McDonald

Kel McDonald draws and writes the Sorcery 101 webcomic, of which I am a huge fan.  She has several other projects going on, but this time I want to talk about Fame and Misfortune.  Fame and Misfortune takes place in the same world as her Sorcery 101 webcomic, but focuses on completely different characters.  Rebecca is a werewolf with magical abilities, who is hired to protect the spoiled pop star, Mistress Lala.  In the course of running down a would-be attacker, she rescues and possibly bites, Marnie.  While protecting Lala, Rebecca also has to explain to Marnie what might happen if she did indeed break the skin, and brings Marnie along on her assignment.

The art is wonderful.  Rebecca is purposely not pretty, but is instead very capable, tough, and appealing in her own way.  The story is well-paced, the dialogue flows well, and there’s enough exposition to keep  you clued in, but it never becomes onerous or obvious.  It just seems like someone explaining things to a new acquaintance that they might need to know.  The action sequences are well drawn.  And Rebecca’s relationship with Connor is remarkably natural and realistically antagonistic.

I was 97% sure I’d like it, based on the fact that I do adore Sorcery 101.  If you’re a fan of the Dresden Files, or Hellboy I’m pretty sure this comic will appeal to you.  Sorcery, werewolves, lesbian werewolves…  Did I mention, Rebecca is an unabashedly queer character.  We need more of them around.

I don’t know what else to say about it without sounding even more like  gribbly fangirl, or giving away too much of the plot.  It’s a quick read, $10 and well worth it.  Order it from Kel’s page today!

If you like the blog or the podcast, please, please, please donate to keep us going.  Donations go to pay for the podcast hosting and website domain, primarily.

Oh, and Honey Badger’s first two songs are available for download here, for free or pay what you want.  We’re also part of a larger compilation to benefit a local venue, with a song written by yours truly.  Check it out (we’re track 16).

Remember we’ve got the GGR Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook page.

First, while I was waiting for the friend who had the extra badge to come down, I saw this duo.

The Littlest Sand Person!!!

Then, while crossing the skybridge to see Larry Hama, I ran into these two:

Scott Summers and Phoenix.

While walking through the expo hall, I saw this flawless lady as Tracy Turnblad from Hairpsray!  A. She is fierce and flawless in that gown.  B. The original Hairspray is one of my most favorite movies of all time!

Tracy Turnblad in her Miss Autoshow gown from Hairspray by John Waters.

This guy as Galactus was standing in the line for Chris Claremont.  If you look closely off to the right, you’ll see the Silver Surfer action figure mounted on a stick that comes off his shoulder!  Best idea EVER!

Galactus. He did an amazing job!!!!

Next up we have the Dr. Whos.  The first picture is of this marvelous family with two tens and two elevens, and Mom as a Dalek.

Took this in front of the Dreaming’s booth. So awesome!

And I ran into this eleven and his tardis at the transit center running to catch my bus!

The Eleventh Doctor and his Tardis!

And finally Black Widow and a friend, and I cannot place which character she is.  Realize that one of  you will tell me and I’ll feel like an idiot for not getting it.  But if you can help me out, awesome.  My google-fu is weak.

Black Widow and Wasp in her new costume!  Thanks to commenter Jadasc!!!

 So, that’s about it.  Sadly, my photos of the guy dressed as Darth Maul, walking on stilts and playing the Imperial March on the bagpipes did not turn out, but I’m sure someone got footage of that.  Where else but Seattle, or possibly Portland?

So, yeah!  AMAZING COSPLAY everyone!  I love and adore you all for what you do!!!

If you like the blog or the podcast, please, please, please donate to keep us going.  Donations go to pay for the podcast hosting and website domain, primarily.

Oh, and Honey Badger’s first two songs are available for download here, for free or pay what you want.  We’re also part of a larger compilation to benefit a local venue, with a song written by yours truly.  Check it out (we’re track 16).

Remember we’ve got the GGR Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook page.

Ok, so I got there and wow, overwhelming!  You walk in the door and it’s a crush of people and a riot of colors everywhere you look.  Cosplayers abound!  We Love Fine, Topatoco, Superhero Stuff, Image Comics, Dark Horse!  It’s slightly less overwhelming than PAX solely because the Expo floor doesn’t look and sound like a gunfight in a disco, but still, it’s pretty overwhelming.  I started off with a stop at the booth Kel McDonald shared with several other Portland area indie-comic artists.  I’m seriously bummed I couldn’t afford her book of porn, but I did pick up the first volume of Fame and Misfortune, which is amazing.  Seriously, I just picked it up to make sure I had the title right and wound up reading the whole thing cover to cover instead of writing this.  It’s awesome.  Review to come later.

Is this not cool? Design your own spiral notebook! This is relevant to all of my interests!!!

After that I wandered around and my next purchase was three comics from Cellar Door Publishing:  I Am Spartacus, Shocking Gun Tales and Chance of a Lifetime (previews of all three books, and others, can be found here).  Expect reviews in the next week or so.  Then I found a booth guaranteed to be catnip to me:  Skullastic!  Seriously, they let you make your own SPIRAL NOTEBOOKS!!!  It’s a passion project of one of the founders to get kids interested in writing, so they make notebooks like “Buffy the Vampire Stapler” and a really nifty Jekyll and Hyde notebook that’s two half-width notepads, bound on both sides.  Super nice people!  I stopped and made a “Three Hole Punch” notebook.  They also donate their profits to local schools, so I love them more.

I wandered around a little more, constrained from buying ALL THE THINGS by the fact that we’re broke right now.  I collected a bunch of business cards and some preview comics.  I saw Chris Claremont, but did not spend the several hours that would have been necessary to get his signature.  I did, as I said, get Larry Hama’s signature for the Geek Husband What Rules, and I’m glad I did.  He adores Hama’s writing.  He has most of the original run of GI Joe and ‘Nam.

I also talked to Jake Richmond, who draws Modest Medusa, and Ben Hsu of Dubious Company.  Modest Medusa is an adorable webcomic about a young Medusa trying to survive in a hostile world.  Dubious company is an anime style webcomic about Pirates?  We had just seen them last week at the Honey Badger performance in Portland.  But it was nice to catch up and see some friendly faces.  I also ran into an old friend from Wenatchee, Chris McFann.  I picked up the convention preview copy of his two books, The Tragic Tale of Willow Lightwheel, and Moneyshot.  I gotta say, given the sample vignette from Moneyshot, I think that book is going to be the magic one.  Willow Lightwheel is cashing in on the

I have been waiting for 13 years for this sketch. Slacker.

Steampunk thing, but I like Moneyshot better.  Just from the two or three pages in this sample book.  I can’t wait to read the rest of it.  The art is beautiful in both books.  And McFann finally got me the Nightcrawler sketch he’s been promising me for, like, 13 years.

I also spent some time hanging out with the lovely and talented Mr. Pete Venters, in the signing area near the Gathering Art Book exhibit.  We talked smack about the Geek Husband What Rules, and I also met the beautiful JhoiraArtificer, whom I had only spoken to on twitter for the longest time.    Then I wandered around and bought

Hide and Seek by Lahela Schoessler. That weird shadow is from one of my MIB Nightcrawler action figures. I always buy two so I can play with one.

the cutest piece of fan art from Lahela Schoessler, who has just recently moved up to Seattle.  After that I was about peopled out. I was grateful to those friends who had booths who let me hide in them from time to time.  But that many people in one spot does tend to make me a little twitchy.

On my way out, I stopped by Geek Chic’s display to say hi to my friend Jen, who is awesome!  And to arrange, hopefully soon, going out and drinking times.

Also, I spoke to some lovely people with a booth promoting their nine year old daughter’s comic (and I didn’t grab a copy, doh!) and the Girl Central Stations site, which promotes girl friendly and empowering products and media, as well as recommending products that don’t talk down to girls, or try to confine them with stereotypical gender roles.

So that was, in a nutshell, my ECCC experience.  I’ll post a separate entry with some of the cosplayers I took pictures of while I was t here.  So much cosplay!!!!!!

If you like the blog or the podcast, please, please, please donate to keep us going.  Donations go to pay for the podcast hosting and website domain, primarily.

Oh, and Honey Badger’s first two songs are available for download here, for free or pay what you want.  We’re also part of a larger compilation to benefit a local venue, with a song written by yours truly.  Check it out (we’re track 16).

Remember we’ve got the GGR Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook page.

I am far too vain to show you a full body shot of what I look like right now. But let’s just say, this bitch is FAT.

I’m fat.

While to many people I don’t look it, I am in fact over the weight where most people think fat people are incapacitated by their fat and unable to function.  I assure you this is not so.  I, and many other fat people, are perfectly functional and healthy, believe it or not.  But even if/when we aren’t healthy or functional, we’re still deserving of basic human decency.

Why am I telling you this?

I’m getting ready to go to Emerald City Comic Con tomorrow for the first time, and I intend to avoid the celebrity section of the con like the plague.

Why?

Because there are certain people who I would rather maintain my mental image of them as awesome people, than meet them and risk seeing that momentary flash of disgust, or whatever negative emotion it might be, in their eyes.  Or better yet, be completely ignored by them in favor of younger, thinner, prettier fans.

Many of you will rush to tell me that it won’t happen, that it’s all in my head, and to some extent you may be, and probably are, correct.  But I’ve seen it happen.  Not with celebrities.  But it happens.

I, apparently, have a sexy as hell phone voice.   I have been told this frequently, before sexual harassment laws were regularly enforced, or in places where they weren’t or if I was talking to someone I didn’t work with, say customer service.  And frequently, when we get a new vendor, they’ll call up and talk to me on the phone, sometimes for months before they meet me.  When they’re dudes, the first physical meeting is always accompanied by that flash in the eyes, and on occasion, “Wow, you don’t look anything like I thought you would.”  I did have a female vendor once tell me that she had thought I’d be “taller” and blonder.  In case you’re wondering, she actually meant “thinner.”  It’s ok, I know.

Being fat in public is kind of crazy-making for any gender, but when you present as female it’s so much worse.  I’ve talked to the Geek Husband What Rules who has been much heavier than he currently is, and he is by no means slender now.  And he admits that women get the fat-shaming harassment so much worse than men, or in his words, “Holy shit!  People actually SAY that to you? They would never say that to a dude!”  When you’re fat people feel free to criticize and comment on your clothing choices, your diet (even if you aren’t anywhere NEAR food at the time), your style, your perceived desperation, that they’d rather die than be that fat, the list goes on.  When you’re a woman, add slut-shaming on top of that, and diet-talk and you’ve got a cocktail of sucking hate.

While SF/F convention fandom, smaller local conventions like say Norwescon or Rustycon, is far more welcoming and forgiving toward fat people than society at large, that’s mostly the fans themselves.  Celebrities come from the world of celebrity, you know, where Jennifer Lawrence is considered chunky.  Even with the welcoming nature of smaller cons, fat fans are often afraid to cosplay, especially any character deemed sexy by the fandom.  They’re afraid to meet their idols.  They sometimes wonder if the furniture at convention hotels will be sturdy enough.  Sometimes people will assume that because they’re fat, they’re also stinky, lazy, stupid…  You know, all those things for which our culture uses fat as shorthand.

Your blogger at the age of 19 as Frank N. Furter in Rocky Horror Picture Show. It’s a shitty Polaroid, sorry.  I don’t have a lot of pictures because at the time I THOUGHT I was fat.

I’ve been thin in fan culture, and I’m currently fat,so I’ve seen both sides of that coin.  I have no doubt that Roger Zelazny asked me to hang out with him when I met him at 19 because I was highly decorative.  And I don’t think he would have if I looked like I look now.  It certainly wasn’t for my witty repartee, because pretty much all I could manage was star struck babbling.  Dude!  ZELAZNY!

Someone once asked me if I would meet Tom Hiddleston if I had the chance, and my honest answer is: I don’t know.  I don’t know because right now the image of him in my head is kind of what’s keeping me sane in my job right now (you will notice that I didn’t say that HE is what’s keeping me sane, this is an important distinction).  I don’t know if I want to risk having that image destroyed by reality.  Granted, there is also the chance that he’d be even more awesome than I imagine him to be, this is true.  That has happened (see Gail Simone, Clive Barker and Felicia Day).  So, yeah, odds are good that I’d suck it up and do it.  Besides, he seems almost comically sweet, really.

But it’s a concern.  I sometimes worry when I host meet-ups that people who meet me for the first time will react badly, or when I do the sex and BDSM panels at conventions.  Which is ridiculous.  I’ve done burlesque at my current size, and had nothing but favorable reactions.  But that fear still lurks in the back of my head, before every performance with Honey Badger, I go through my responses to any possible “Hey, Fattie!” hecklers at shows in my head, again, not that I’ve encountered any yet.

Who knows?  Maybe I’ll get all gothic princessed up, suck it up and wander by the celebrity area after all.

If you like the blog or the podcast, please, please, please donate to keep us going.  Donations go to pay for the podcast hosting and website domain, primarily.

Oh, and Honey Badger’s first two songs are available for download here, for free or pay what you want.  We’re also part of a larger compilation to benefit a local venue, with a song written by yours truly.  Check it out (we’re track 16).

Remember we’ve got the GGR Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook page.